There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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