Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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