They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize