Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize