well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
