Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
