Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
it's like heaven, but drunker
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
