Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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