I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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