Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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