why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
