You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
