Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
