I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize