I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize