he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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