She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
