doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Nicole vs. Life
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
