Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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