Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
