It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
