So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
