just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
