apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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