sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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