Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
