even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Randomize