it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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