Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
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