is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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