It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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