I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I touched a dick in church today
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
