id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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