VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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