Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
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Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
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So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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