You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
i believe in u and ur pee
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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