Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Bang-toberfest begins!!
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
