I'm so fucking centered right now
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
