she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
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I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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