she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize