she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
