Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
