he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
