The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
