Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
