I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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