brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
