My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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