Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone says I win the strip club
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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