You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
youre lurking in front of me
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
